First Half of 2023

I spent the first 6 months of 2023 traveling to 4 different countries, visiting 5 other cities, and getting a promotion. I was also able to accomplish a few big projects. I felt like I became more ambitious than ever — despite everything that has happened to me.

Last December in 2022, I did 1-week of silent meditation retreat in Bali Usada. It was indeed a great experience and I learned a lot to be grounded and understanding myself more, especially about my past life — like past past past life. I think on the third or fourth day, I had a dream about how I died several times in my past life(s). Then I woke up and my chest felt so much in pain. Of course, the next day, I felt so sad. It's still very difficult for me to accept myself and these abilities. Why I could see or hear things? Why I could travel to different dimensions? What's the purpose of my life and why was I born again in this world? And so many things. But most importantly why am I different from most people? Even tho, though I met different people who have similar stories or abilities, I couldn't help to feel alienated sometimes. Especially if you are in Jakarta.

Pak Heru then told me that my dream represents how many lives that I’ve been through before— and this is my fourth life, coming back to samsara. And it is never an easy process when you finally remember everything.

I am still in the process to accept my situation and embrace everything. That’s why, I was also happy that I was able to go through 2023 with so many activities as a normal person. After all, it’s okay to be different, and it’s okay if people don’t understand you and your unique self. And, somehow you leading an extraordinary life with so much exciting memories.

So, cheers to 2023!